When noon approached, I remembered my earlier observations about the internet. Something as dramatic as what happened to Bella would surely make the local news wherever she was from. I stared at the door with trepidation, knowing a run in with Rose would result in an immediate confrontation. She loathed me. For me one, I hated her boyfriend and made no secret about that fact. Secondly, she was under the impression I had corrupted her darling twin brother. I mentally snorted at this. If she only knew how much trouble I kept him out of.

With a resigned sigh, I rose from my bed and opened the door slowly, like a fucking bomb was about to go off outside it. Peeking out, and down the hall, I slowly made my way to the second story of the house, walking down the stairs in as much silence as possible. I noticed the hallway was empty, and all the doors closed, so I slowly made my way to the front of the hall, to Carlisle’s office where the computer was located. Once inside, I closed the door and locked it, letting out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding.

I walked over the expensive machine and started it up with a hum, collapsing in the desk chair and running my hand over my face to keep me alert. I performed my search without many results at first, before I realized Bella was probably short for something else. I eventually landed success on a search for her last name. A local newspaper in Phoenix, Arizona had an article on the incident. Before clicking the link, I allowed myself a moment of guilt for going behind Bella’s back for this information. It was, however, short lived. Fuck it.

I loaded the page and began reading.

Home Invasion in Quiet Phoenix Suburb Leaves One Dead, One Injured.

Thirty year old Phillip Dwyer was charged Tuesday with the murder of Thirty Four year old school teacher, Renee Swan. Preceding the murder charge, Dwyer is also charged with kidnapping, assault and battery with a deadly weapon with intent to kill, and breaking and entering. More charges are pending.

Authorities were called to 250 Maple Avenue after a distress call last week. Officers arrived to find the body of Swan inside the home. The cause of death was a knife wound to the throat. Upon further inspection of the home, authorities found Swan’s sixteen year old daughter locked in a bedroom closet, bound and gagged. She suffered numerous broken bones and lacerations and is being held in protective custody at Phoenix Medical Center for treatment of malnutrition and dehydration. She is said to be in stable condition. Her name is being withheld pending the notification of relatives.

Dwyer admitted Sunday to breaking into his ex-girlfriend’s home five weeks ago, and holding Swan and her daughter hostage for nearly a month. The exact events leading up to the incident are unclear, but Dwyer admits to intentionally injuring his victims and shows no remorse for his actions. His mental condition remains unclear as well, pending psychiatric evaluation before the trial…

I stopped reading and shut the computer down, disappointed I didn’t get as much information as I had hoped, but relieved to learn the perpetrator was in custody. Deciding my curiosity could only be satiated by Bella herself, I made my way back to my room. I could hear the most repulsive noises coming from Emmet’s bedroom door, and both cringed at the fact I was in such close proximity to their… intimacy, and smiled at the fact they were both far too occupied to notice.

I returned to my bedroom and sighed contentedly. This room was my sanctuary. Even if it couldn’t supply me with the sleep I so desperately desired, it provided me with much needed privacy. I was a very private person. I didn’t even allow Jasper into my bedroom most times. I don’t think Bella fully appreciated the gravity of the situation on Friday when she asked my permission to remain in my room. But of course how could she? She didn’t know me.

I walked over to my balcony doors with the intention of catching a smoke, but got a sudden rush of dizziness. I stood, swaying in the middle of my room, and instinctively knew my sleep deprivation was reaching its peak. Experience taught me if I didn’t try to catch some sleep soon, I’d succumb to the worse symptoms. Since I had no particular desire to hallucinate this afternoon, I swayed over to my bedside table and set my alarm clock for two hours away.

I don’t even remember lying down on the bed, but I must have, because two hours later the screeching of my alarm clock tore me away from the dream I was having. I shot straight up in bed, panting and sweating, and smelling like Emmet on a practice day. I raised a trembling hand to my clock to cease the unsettling buzzing noise. It took me a long while to recover, but I didn’t move a muscle, just fucking sat there shaking in bed with tears running down my face like a fucking baby. I was disgusted with myself.

---

Carlisle returned that evening to an inconspicuously clean house. I sent him a curt greeting on the way to the kitchen to make myself a sandwich, which I ate alone in my room. I figured I’d go out tonight at midnight. I would have to sneak out through my balcony to avoid the notice of Daddy C., but I was rather experienced at this task. I almost considered bringing my sketch pad or a book for Bella, then decided it would be too dark to enjoy such activities.

So at precisely midnight, I made my way out to the balcony empty handed. Swinging my legs over the wooden railing with a grace I wasn’t sure I’d possess in my sluggish state, I climbed down the lattice covering the south wall of the house. With a quiet thud, I landed lithely on the soft wet grass of my back yard. So fucking smooth. I inwardly gloated as I turned to make my way to gazebo.

Like last night, Bella was already seated on the bench waiting for me, her long brown hair free from her hood. She turned when she heard me approaching and sent me a small smile which I returned.

“How very juvenile delinquent of you.” She quietly goaded as I took a seat at my side of the bench. It took me a moment to understand what she was referring to.

“Oh,” I said slightly surprised she was watching me. “You saw that then?” I questioned with a smirk. She nodded in the darkness and I just shrugged at her.

She rolled her eyes at my nonchalance towards sneaking out and slid a plastic bag down the table. More cookies. I smiled and reached in the bag to take one. I wasn’t hesitant like I was last night, having more confidence in Bella’s baking skills. I took a bite of the cookie and immediately recognized it as peanut butter. But not just any peanut butter… fucking delicious peanut butter. My eyes rolled into the back of my head a little.

“Mmm.” I hummed. “What’s the name of this cookie?” I questioned while consuming the cookie reverently.

“Peanut Butter Panacea.” She replied in a smug tone, taking a cookie from the bag and biting into it.

I let out a little chuckle at her use of impressive verbiage. “Panacea…” I said slowly, looking at the cookie in my hand. “A cure all. Appropriate.” I said with a smirk and finished my cookie.

She shrugged modestly. “It’s an older recipe; the best peanut butter in my collection.” She replied confidently. We sat in silence for a while, enjoying the cookie cure all. It wasn’t raining tonight, which is an unusual event for Forks, but there was a wet lingering mist in the air, and since it was mid-November, it was still cold as fuck. This was a good thing however. I took a moment to appreciate Bella’s smell which was wafting over me from the slight breeze. She smelled like cookies and flowers. Very feminine. After a long while, the sound of Bella’s soft voice broke the silence.

“I fell asleep today.” Bella said in sad tone. I turned towards her to notice she had her head down, her hair shielding her face from my view. You too huh?

“Yeah, me too actually.” I frowned. “How long?” I asked, swinging my leg to straddle the bench so I could face her.

Bella shrugged. “Three hours maybe. I was home alone on the couch watching television when I fell asleep. Then I woke up… from a dream…” She trailed off in a low voice and turned to face me then. Her eyes didn’t look quite as tired as last night, though you could still clearly make out the dark circles around them even in the darkness of the gazebo. She licked her lips and darted her eyes around the misty yard before meeting my gaze again. She leaned towards me slightly and continued in a whisper. “I was in my bedroom again.” I furrowed my brow and leaned towards her to hear her better. “In my old house.” She darted her eyes around the yard again and licked her lips, something I was recognizing as a nervous habit of hers. “He was waiting for me… in the closet again… hiding there when I got into bed.”

She paused then, with a reluctant look on her face, so I nodded, encouraging her to continue. I was far too curious now. She turned her whole body towards me then, and brought her knees up to her chest, hugging them tightly. “He came out when he thought I had fallen asleep… but I didn’t. I saw the closet door opening… but I was… frozen or something. I couldn’t scream or do anything. All I could do was watch it all happen again.” She darted her eyes again and started rocking slowly back and forth. I was completely mesmerized and I’m sure my eyes were wide in anticipation. “He just… attacked me while I was still lying in bed. And the next thing I know, I’m tied up in the closet, bleeding.” She grimaced and rested her chin on her knees.

“It’s the smaller things you remember the best, you know?” she whispered in a thoughtful tone. “Like the way the smell of blood made me nauseous, but when I tried to vomit… I choked because of the gag in my mouth.“ She had a far away look in her eyes. After a few seconds she seemed to snap back into reality, shaking her head a little, then meeting my gaze again. She shifted her head so her cheek was lying on her knees and she was looking out at the river. “Anyways… that’s what my dream was about. And it was worse because I was home alone.” She sighed.

I was kind of stunned into silence for a moment, my head swimming with thoughts of closets, and blood, and vomit, and completely appreciating what Bella meant about remembering the smaller things. Bella’s story was definitely, without a doubt, thirteen shades of fucked up. It was nice to know I wasn’t the only one. Possibly, Bella handled it better than I did, but she’s only been doing this for a year. I’ve been doing it most of my life.

“I’m sorry.” Bella’s quiet whisper broke me out of my thoughts. I turned then, slightly fucking annoyed.I was going to snap at her for apologizing before I caught the sad look on her face.

“What are you sorry about this time?” I asked, forcing the softest tone my irritability would allow.

She bit her lip and turned her body back around on the bench. “I didn’t mean to burden you with all my problems, I shouldn’t have.” She replied, likely misunderstanding my thoughtful silence.

“Don’t be stupid, Bella.” I sighed and snatched another cookie out of the bag on the table. “You keep bringing me cookies and you can burden me all you want.” I replied with a smirk. I mean, I couldn’t let her feel bad about telling me her dreams when I’m dying to know about them anyways. Unfortunately I could still see her skepticism, so with another heavy sigh I put the cookie back in the bag and rubbed my hands together.

“Okay.” I said slowly, bracing myself for the bullshit I was willing to go through to put Bell’s conscious at ease. “Would it make you feel better if I told you about the dream I woke up from today?” I asked forcing a tight smile.

She turned to me then with a look of unadulterated curiosity on her face and nodded.